In an era dominated by Instagram likes and Snapchat streaks, the mental health of teenagers is increasingly at risk.1States are now beginning to raise the age required to create social media accounts. Utah has raised the age to 18 and Florida to 16. More states are expected to follow suit (https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2024/jan/25/florida-social-media-teenager-ban-bill). Experts are concerned about the impact social media use has on a teen’s brain (https://www.yalemedicine.org/news/social-media-teen-mental-health-a-parents-guide). Parents carry many worries into the digital landscape in which their teens live, and these concerns are not without warrant. The content on a TikTok profile is called a “feed,” but what is being “fed” to teens is having a toxic impact.2“How Social Media Can Negatively Affect Your Child,” Cleveland Clinic, January 15, 2024, https://health.clevelandclinic.org/dangers-of-social-media-for-youth. Concerning statistics have caused experts to raise a clarion call that social media use should be limited or even avoided in the teen years.
There are good experiences that social media can bring such as opportunities for learning, creative expression, and connection with friends and family who live far away. However, a rapidly growing concern that requires our keen attention is the potential harm that social media can have on a teen’s mental health.
The concerning statistics
A quick look at statistics reveals a concerning trend. Between 2007 and 2017, Pew Research found that the number of teens experiencing depression increased by 59% over a 10-year period.3A.W. Geiger and Leslie Davis, “A growing number of American teenagers – particularly girls – are facing depression,” Pew Research Center, July 12, 2019, https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2019/07/12/ a-growing-number-of-american-teenagers-particularly-girls-are-facing-depression/. It is no coincidence that, in the same timeframe, the top three social media platforms used by teens were introduced: Instagram in October of 2010, Snapchat in September of 2011, and TikTok in September of 2016.
Continuing this trend, in October of 2021 an alarming warning came from the American Academy of Pediatrics declaring a national state of emergency in children’s mental health.4“AAP-AACAP-CHA Declaration of a National Emergency in Child and Adolescent Mental Health,” American Academy of Pediatrics, October 19, 2021, AAP-AACAP-CHA Declaration of a National Emergency in Child and Adolescent Mental Health In December of 2021, the United States surgeon general issued a statement highlighting the urgent need to address the mental health crisis in our nation’s youth.5“Protecting Youth Mental Health: The U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory,” Health and Human Services, 2021, https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/surgeon-general-youth-mental-health-advisory.pdf
Then, in February of 2022, Pew Research released a study showing parents’ greatest worries related to pandemic school closures caused by the pandemic were academics (67%) and their children’s emotional and mental health (61%).6“A growing number of American teenagers – particularly girls – are facing depression,” https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2019/07/12/ a-growing-number-of-american-teenagers-particularly-girls-are-facing-depression/ It is precisely in those two categories that teens are now showing significant decline. However, the pandemic was not the sole cause of mental health issues. Excessive social media use has raised concern around teen mental health both before and after the pandemic.
Yet another warning came in May 2023 from the surgeon general stating there “are ample indicators that social media can also have a profound risk of harm to the mental health and well-being of children and adolescents.”7Matt Richtel, Catherine Pearson, and Michael Levenson,“Surgeon General Warns That Social Media May Harm Children and Adolescents,” The New York Times, May 23, 2023, https://www.nytimes.com/2023/05/23/health/surgeon-general-social-media-mental-health.html
Living in the world without becoming of the world feels like an uphill battle when the world is carried around in the pockets of their teens.
Parents are not surprised by these trends, statistics, or warnings; they serve only to confirm what is already known. They see their teens engaging with their phones at addiction-level status. Living in the world without becoming of the world feels like an uphill battle when the world is carried around in the pockets of their teens. Every touch of their phone lures them in. Scrolling social media is what most teens spend their time doing when their phone is in hand. However, this commonplace activity is increasing their tendency toward anxiety and depression with every smooth swipe of their glassy feed.
5 problematic signs of teen’s social media use
It’s in this setting that parents are seeking to shepherd the souls and hearts of their teens. As they do, they must now also watch for signs that could indicate a struggle in their teen’s mental health due to the influence of social media. As a counselor and parent who has navigated this terrain for many years, let me offer five signs to which parents should be attuned. These are not the only signs, but they are common indicators that social media use could be impacting your teen negatively.
1. Withdrawal from family
Preferring to isolate rather than engage with family or participate in family activities. Having a notable unwillingness or pulling away when parents ask them to put their phones away.
2. Phone separation anxiety
Feeling anxious or compulsive about checking their phone either upon waking or throughout the day. Overly distressed when phone privileges have been taken away or limited.
3. Decreased motivation
A notable lack of enthusiasm or interest in the day ahead, including school or social activities they usually enjoy. Very low interest in attending to responsibilities even when it will negatively impact them to be left undone.
4. Negative outlook or self-talk
Expressing negative thoughts about themselves or their future because of social media comparisons, cyberbullying, or the loneliness connected with excessive time spent alone on their devices.
5. Physical impact
Decreased hygiene and poor sleep due to time on social media. Skipping meals linked to stress or preoccupation with social media. Headaches, eye strain, or muscle tension from prolonged screen use.
How parents can help
If the signs above describe your teen, there are some things you can do. First, remember that the Lord is your helper. He is an ever-present help in troubled times both for you and your teen. It can be tempting to allow your mind to go to worst-case-scenarios, but that is not helpful. Instead, anchor your heart and mind to the hope found in the eternal truth of God’s Word. Prayerfully seek the Lord for wisdom and consider the following steps.
Set boundaries
Establish clear rules for social media use including time limits. Check in phones at night. Teens should not sleep with their phones. Set a place and time phones will be docked and turned off for the night.
Monitor usage
Keep an eye on the apps and platforms your teen uses. Be aware of who they are friends with online and the interaction between those friends. Keep communication open about expectations around time and usage of devices and platforms.
Model healthy screen use
Let your teens see you putting away your phone in social or family settings. Engage fully in conversations by putting your phone away. Create tech-free times or spaces and take intentional extended breaks from social media.
Promote offline activities
Encourage your teen to engage in activities that don’t involve screens. Create times in the family routine where screens are not present. Get outdoors when possible, and encourage activities that involve physical participation.
Seek help
If you are noticing a decline in your teen’s mental health, seek the help of others. Your pastor can be a good place to start. Many pastors have trusted counselors they refer to that can help. Talk to teachers, youth pastors, coaches, or mentors who know your teen well and can provide input related to your concerns. It is also good to consult with your teen’s doctor when you notice changes that could be related to mental health concerns.
We need to help teens see how their relationship with screens affects their relationship with God and others.
Navigating the world of social media is an area of parenting, but it is also an area of discipleship. We need to help teens see how their relationship with screens affects their relationship with God and others. Proactive engagement goes a long way in preventing social media from becoming a dominating influence in your teen’s life. By guiding teens with wisdom and intentionality, parents can help ensure that social media does not become a detrimental force, but rather a tool to be wisely utilized with caution and balance.
This article is from the Winter 2024 issue of Light magazine, Finding Rest in the Wilderness: Hope and Help for Mental Health Struggles.
